We’ve moved!

Posted: 2011/03/02 in Just...hey!

Not far away, though, trust us!

All you have to do is go to our new site, digitalporridge.com, and the staff there will treat you like old friends. Which you are. Of course.

If you’re coming to this link from far in the future, congratulations! Humanity has survived the zombocalypse and hopefully so has the digitalporridge.com site as well!

So, fare thee well, tally ho and good luck! We will see you at our fresh, new (unless you’re viewing this site in the year 4127) web site very soon (unless our clones have had a glitch regenerating our minds, in which case watch out for the vampyre werewolves)!

Let’s start this out Star Trek-style!

 

Next up: a personal grooming tip

 

You’ll need to look closely at this one…


(we’d love to say ‘Only in America!’ – oh…hang on, we just did)

 

And finally, just to tuck you in:

Is you is a podcaster?

Posted: 2011/02/24 in Just...hey!

Well, is you?

If you are, and you like our stuff, let’s trade some promotional spots on each other’s podcasts!

We’ve got a few 30-second MP3 files here that you can grab and stick anywhere in your…podcast, so download ’em, give ’em a listen and put them in your show somewhere.

If you want, email Frank and we’ll drop your promos in our show, too! We’re probably already listening to your show anyway, but if we’re not just post a comment with a link and we’ll give it a gander…err, a listen! We’ll listen to it, for sure.

Anyway, here are the promo bits:

Hugh Grant and Barack Obama are our spokesbitches

Mat sings for ya!

We have no idea what we’re doing

This podcast is rubbish (please don’t be offended!)

…and that’s not the porn movie from ‘The Big Lebowski’

Check us out! Well, you’re already here, which is where this link sends you…so…I guess that means stay on this web page…?

But nah, really, if you like Mat and Frank, check us out in action on Mat’s other regular podcast, Logjam, which also features Frank in an ‘from an American perspective’ sort of role. But mostly that bit’s about zombies and cyborgs trying to take over the world, so watch where you step.

Subscribe to Logjam: with iTunes or by RSS link (for any non-Apple podcast listening thingy)

So what’s up in this episode? Well, we experiment with radio-style ‘what is this sound’ games, Mat frets about his abuse of his cat, we introduce Digital Porridge-branded ‘Mancones’, talk about being ‘a homeless’, benevolent dictators and a whole lot more! Check it out…

Download Episode 17 right here! (right-click and choose Save Link As), or use the iTunes link

 

Mister Scruff’s opinion of his treatment is clear for all to see

 

 

From the Poop Report website comes this review of the Bottom Buddy Toilet Tissue Holder:

The Bottom Buddy consists of a curved plastic handle with a golf-ball sized head at one end. The head features flexible plastic pieces that resemble the closed bud of a flower. Pry the petals apart, insert a wad of toilet paper or a moist wipe, and it’s as if your arm has just grown a foot longer. Reach back (from in front or behind), wipe, and then press the release button on the handle to drop the soiled paper into the toilet.

(OK, fair enough, it’s also extremely helpful for people with injuries and medical conditions. But still. Frank has seen it on sites devoted to extraordinarily obese people.)

Thanks to Dr Jax at muus.co.uk for the Dalek-voiced DP samples! Very cool. Can you count how many samples were used during this show? Seriously, can you? We sort of lost count.

And finally, a horse with one ball isn’t called anything, according to what a quick Wikipedia scan brings up. A castrated male horse is  called a gelding, though (don’t scroll down that page if you’re a guy).

 

Listen to this episode right here! (just don’t close your browser tab/window!)

(note: this player widget will stop working after a few newer episodes have been released – we can only upload so much to this in-browser player tool – if it doesn’t play just download it here and listen to it on your PC/Mac – and try to keep up with the schedule, dammit!)

 

This is how Mat taunts his cat – with pictures of other cats free from cones and able to roam freely and pee in their master’s shoes.

As always, we’d really  appreciate any reviews on iTunes and ‘Likes’ on Facebook!

A few difficulties putting this show to bed, so apologies up front for any strangeness with the show! In this one we’re talking about the upcoming London Olympics, the limitations of American-style ‘posh’ branding, and the pulling power of making sweeping judgments on the dental habits of an entire culture.

Download Episode 16 right here! (right-click and choose Save Link As)

Just so you can see some paralympic runners in action, check out this video!

 

And for Mat’s favorite brand of food, on both continents, check out

 

We’re still looking for feedback from our listeners, so please leave a comment here on the blog, on iTunes or on Facebook!

 

Listen to this episode right here! (just don’t close your browser tab/window!)

(note: this player widget will stop working after a few newer episodes have been released – we can only upload so much to this in-browser player tool – if it doesn’t play just download it here and listen to it on your PC/Mac – and try to keep up with the schedule, dammit!)

 

When you’re done listening, please review us on iTunes or Podcast Alley

Tell your friends about us, and encourage them to subscribe either on iTunes or with the RSS feed.

Get in touch : the DP blog | Facebook | Twitter | email Mat | email Frank | send us a voice or musical message! : Subscribe : iTunes | RSS feed : Review usiTunes | Podcast Alley : Catch Up! : Get the Episodes 1-10 Archive

In this show we’re  talking about sniffing each other’s bums,  being a missionary for another culture, various dreams we’ve had (as in, what we do while we sleep), bad laundry habits, swearing in front of our mothers, The Most Awesome Address in the World, and a reminder of our Exclusive Listener Ultimatum!

Download Episode 15 right here! (right-click and choose Save Link As)

Not sure what the hell ‘dubstep’ is? It’s one of the latest mainstream trends in electronic dance music, and it goes a little somethin’ like this:

This sort of music works the best if you can blast it at 5,000 watts from a car looking like this

or better yet, this

As for Mat’s ‘fear of being naked in front of a group of peers’, this is what ‘plimsoll shoes’ look like:

These are what kids use during their PE lessons. There are grown-up versions like this one with Run-DMC branding:

Find out all about the various Gropecunt Lanes of Ye Olde Englande on Wikipedia!

Or take a tour of England’s more lecherous street names like Love Lane, Butt Hole Road, Dumb Woman’s Lane, Mincing Lane, Crotch Crescent…but our favorite has to be

(Let’s not forget our runners-up Titty Ho, Back Passage, Pennycomequick Hill, Fine Bush Lane and Minge Lane!)

Finally, we’d like to remind all of our listeners that the only thing we ask of our listeners is that we get some feedback: whether it’s right here on the blog, on iTunes or even FacebookOR ELSE!


Listen to this episode right here! (just don’t close your browser tab/window!)

(note: this player widget will stop working after a few newer episodes have been released – we can only upload so much to this in-browser player tool – if it doesn’t play just download it here and listen to it on your PC/Mac – and try to keep up with the schedule, dammit!)

 

When you’re done listening, please rate us on iTunes or Podcast Alley

Tell your friends about us, and encourage them to subscribe either on iTunes or with the RSS feed.

Get in touch : the DP blog | Facebook | Twitter | email Mat | email Frank | send us a voice or musical message! : Subscribe : iTunes | RSS feed : Rate usiTunes | Podcast Alley : Catch Up! : Get the Episodes 1-10 Archive